"Aku terima nikahnya" from Ustaz Hasrizal
"Melihat perkahwinan sebagai medan untuk memberi , akan menjadikan kita lebih memikirkan soal PERANAN dan bukan nya HAK yang tidak berkesudahan .."
"Satu Rasa Dua Hati" from Ustaz Pahrol
"Perkahwinan dimulakan dengan percintaan , tetapi disempurnakan dengan tanggungjawab . Dan sebaik-baik cinta ialah cinta yang didasarkan oleh tanggungjawab .."
"Bunga Kebahagiaan" from Tuan Guru Dato' Nik Abdul Aziz Nik Mat
"Isteri yang benar-benar ingin membahagiakan suaminya akan selalu berusaha mematuhi suaminya dan tidak mengutamakan orang lain lebih daripada suaminya .."
"Cinta Luar Biasa di alam rumahtangga" from Ustazah Latipah
"Diantara kita senang benar menganalisis diri orang lain , mencatat cacat cela manusia, tetapi payah mempelajari jiwa nya sendiri yang berselaput noda bergelumang dosa tanpa disedari .."
Well , if to share about all the contents of these 4 books , perhaps this entry come out to 3-4 pages , so let's summarize here to a simple points . Listed below are not only from these books , but from what i have observed and felt .
As a summarize..
In marriage , there are some things you may take and digest . This point however i would suggest just keep in mind but don't take it to the heart. The thing is, it wont be DIFFICULT if you realise that the journey that you are about to take is as new for him as it is for you . Enter the marriage without any expectations on your spouse. Enter the marriage as if it is a blank book waiting for its pages to be filled by two eager writers who are full of ideas and things to share . Yes ! Let's make a list :
1) Always remember this : Marriage is an Ibadah . So approach it that way !! Making each other happy (with sincerity and honesty) would mean that you are making ALLAH happy . When things get difficult keep this in mind . Constantly remind yourself this . Insya Allah , you will always keep your calm and present your best smile to your spouse always and in return when you see your spouse returning your smile . The feeling you will experience..no words can describe =)
2) Classic text book theories : Always be sincere, honest, patient and understanding . You may get tired reading these four words over & over again but trust me . THESE four words should be constantly on your mind always and always .
Eg ; The way we approach things..when there are things that one of us did that the other one did not really prefer instead of the normal "merajuk", getting angry or annoyed , we would make the effort to keep calm , take some time to ponder and then sit down and discuss with each other how we both feel and most importantly discuss how we could both improve things . Its not about the blaming game . What would you get from blaming each other ? Pain.. It may be satisfying at first to make the other suffer but in the long run you will both lose . Why not.. Make each other happy by sharing how you feel , figure out a way together how to improve things and in return you will both end up happy and satisfied insya ALLAH . Yes yes , lots of good point here . Keep it noted ! =)
3) Respect. This is so important. As a wife , when your husband share his bogus ideas and visions, even its too idealistic , you have to always given him the respect even he sometimes think he dont deserve it . And for guys , woman have soo many weaknesses , for myself , emotionally i must admit (soo sensitive one) . Never make your husband/wife feel weak or helpless , listen to her ideas , how bogus it may be , respect his/her views though they may not be relevant to the particular context . Make sure you will always been giving a motivation to keep hanging on..to keep on fighting and most importantly to keep on reaching for his/her goals though the circumstances around his/her are limiting his/her from doing so . Yes , respect is what you should give!
4) Love & Humour . Love.. I need not explain further . You will know when the time comes . HUMOUR that you must have in your marriage . Look at how the Prophet Muhammad S.A.W used to entertain His beloved wife Aisyah . That's how you should spend your time enjoying your marriage with your husband . Make your husband/wife laugh always until she/he cant remember the last time he/she felt really sad or depressed . Truely laughter is the best medicine. Again making your husband or wife happy is an Ibadah . Masya Allah ! Isn't Allah GREAT.. Allah makes it soo easy for us to please HIM but we often (or in this case I often) forget to give our thanks to Allah and make sacrifices for the sake of ALLAH .
Well these are just the few basic tips i'd like to share with you guys . My turn will be very soon then , i will proceed to work hard to be the best writer for my new story , new life . InsyaALLAH ..
Will come out with my next entry soon . Take care guys
wALLAHua'lam .
